Silly Normality
by ConstructiveRomance
Summary: If Hermione occasionally found herself thinking about him all day - well, that was bloody fine, too.


**Silly ****Normality**

* * *

The loud, incessant thumping in her head was the first thing Hermione noticed that morning. Her vision swam, dizzy, and she stilled for a minute while grumbling. She massaged her temples, cursing the self-inflicted pain she had brought upon herself. Hermione usually didn't indulge in too much drink for the sole reason that it inhibited her capacity to get work done the next day.

Last night was somewhat of a blur.

Ron's engagement to Jessica had started off so civilly, downright classy, that Hermione should have known it would end up raucous and careless. Those two were always up for a night partying, a fact Hermione had never before been so painfully aware of as she continued to rub her temples.

There was a lovely dinner, Hermione remembered all of that. She drank wine, the groom and bride to be said touching, heart-warming speeches that had her blowing her nose and dabbing her eyes. They stayed until close and went on to meet friends at the Leaky Cauldron.

Oh, lord, she had told Ron then incessantly how much she loved him and was happy for him. Hermione cringed, willing herself to forget that memory, too. On the other hand, she recalled also with great mortification how she had blessed Jessica and called her 'a wonder woman who never ceased to amaze'. Oh, Merin.

Shots, they had definitely done shots then.

Luna had told her she was going to travel across Europe for snorkaks.. Hermione mentally reminded herself to follow up on this. Was Luna really leaving? She couldn't be thinking such thinky thoughts at this hour of the morning, Hermione decided with a wince.

Seamus had twirled her madly in the middle of the pub to some god awful wizarding music she didn't even know.

Had she, Ron and Harry really laughed in Ginny's face when she said Malfoy was looking better these days? She hoped her friend forgot that, she could do without the grovelling it took for Ginny to forgive a grudge.

The end of the night… Hermione's brain almost pained as she tried to recall her memories. What had happened after that? She glanced around and spotted a streamer. Ah, yes, they had all sang ballads about love while she and Harry blew streamers at the poignant moments. Great mates they were.

Great mates. Oh god. Oh, no.

Instinctively, Hermione pulled the covers up to her chin before pressing her eyes into them as if she could push the memory out of her head again. Clips of she and Harry, delving into deep conversation, earnestly confessing how much they admired each other - oh, no, she had kissed Harry.

Hermione had instigated a kiss with Harry.

Things got pretty heated and then Hermione was at home.

She let out a loud groan, "Hermione, what on earth were you thinking! This is going to make everything horrible and awkward." The words rang in her ears, and she contemplated them, "Maybe not, maybe we can laugh this off…" She got out of bed, eager for a cup of tea, and threw on some tracksuit bottoms and a loose grey t-shirt that had seen better days. Hermione refused to look in the mirror, not knowing if she took off her make-up or took the clips out of her hair. She could deal with that mess when she had the willpower.

How could they just laugh that off? How utterly embarrassing, mortifying. Hermione rummaged around her floor for her wand. She would never know how her drunk counterpart managed to thoroughly destroy the room in search of pyjamas.

Perhaps Harry thought of it as nothing more than a drunken kiss. No more, no less. The immediate pang of regret reverberated in Hermione's chest, and she felt woozy. It would do her no good to dwell on this. She liked Harry fine, he was her best friend, ok? Fine.

She thought he was good looking, fine.

If Hermione occasionally found herself thinking about him all day - well, that was bloody fine, too.

For a moment, Hermione allowed herself to not think about the consequences and revel in the fact she and Harry _kissed_. Hermione and Harry had kissed. The word _finally_ hung on her mind but Hermione refused to acknowledge it.

Hermione touched her lips tentatively, but this moment of reflection and serenity was quickly scattered into pieces of dread. There was a knock on her door.

As strange as it was, Hermione recognised her friends knocks. She knew that knock. Maybe she could ignore him - yes, she would pretend she was out and deal with this all when she didn't feel like her head was about to explode.

Hermione quickly filled a glass of water and gulped it greedily, listening with a mild sense of guilt as the knocking continued.

"Hermione? Come on, Hermione, I know you're there."

Panic swelled. She was going to have to answer the door. Besides, Hermione had never been able to successfully lie to him really. For reasons she would later deem baffling, Hermione tried to smoothen her hair, tuck it behind her ears and wipe any residue make up from beneath her eyes.

She straightened her clothes - as if that could fix how ridiculous she looked - and approached the door, "I'm coming."

Harry nearly fell through the door when she opened it, causing her to stifle a laugh, "About to barge my door down, were you?"

"If necessary, sure."

The moment of levity quickly evaporated and Hermione felt heat rising in her face. This was all wrong, why were they so awkward? She looked down at her socks, "So.. do you want to come in?"

Harry scratched the back of his head, "Er, yeah sure."

Hermione walked back toward the kitchen, leaving Harry to follow. She didn't allow herself to glance back, only kept her eyes forward as she racked her brains for something - _anything_ \- neutral to say.

"What a celebration -" Hermione started, the same time as Harry said, "A great night for Ron-"

They fell into a horribly tense 'no, you' exchange as they tried to let the other person speak first. Eventually, silence fell over the room. Hermione closed her eyes for a minute. She didn't think she had ever been so tired.

This was wrong. Hermione and Harry hadn't felt awkward around each other in years. They knew so many intimate, inane, embarrassing details about each other. If they hadn't heard the story, they had been there for each others cringey moments. A simple kiss couldn't possibly reduce them to terse replies and uncomfortable quiet, could it?

She felt around for something to grasp onto and finally fell on, "Tea?"

Harry nodded, seeming almost grateful, and took a seat at her small table. Hermione busied herself with filling the kettle and putting it on, wiping down the counter as they waited for it to boil. The sound of the kettle heating seared through the silence, and Hermione now had another reason for her tea reverence.

"This - this seems silly, doesn't it?"

Hermione cursed under her breath - of course the boy who lived would bring this up. Eager to play it off, "What are you talking about, Harry?" She was going to hell for the enormity of this lie.

He sagged against his chair, eyes wide, "Oh - _oh_, you don't… you don't remember," He trailed off, his eyes slowly narrowing as he watched her and Hermione busied herself with fetching mugs and tea bags. With a sudden gusto, Harry thrust a pointed finger in her direction, "Hang on, you're lying!"

She sighed, immediately folding, "Fine, I do remember. Why can't we just forget, Harry?" Herminone tried to ignore how much that sounded like childish whining.

"I thought you were going to just dance around it all morning, but actually, you want to live in denial. Gryffindor, hmmm.." He trailed off, a small grin on the very cusp of forming - as if it was unsure if it's presence was welcome.

Feeling the ache in her feet from too much dancing, Hermione grudgingly took a seat opposite her friend, "My head isn't exactly at optimum performance right now."

"Anyway, I don't want this to ruin our friendship, Hermione… I've always been afraid of something like this happening and we'd lose every-"

Hermione interrupted with a loud snort, "Ruin our friendship? Harry, that is ridiculous. I honestly don't think either of us even know how to not speak to each other." She shook her head, "One silly kiss can't fell a friendship, especially like ours, just like that."

He abruptly closed his mouth, stunned. Hermione secretly revelled in this feat; in all his preparation for this conversation, he had obviously not imagined it going this way. She took the minute of reprieve to observe him; he did not look as bad as she. From the damp sheen at the top of his head, and the heavenly citrus smell clinging to his presence, he had the good grace to take a shower before racing over here.

He wore dark blue jeans and a forest green t-shirt, paired with an old pair of white, beaten runners. He looked great, fresh, warm; Harry.

Hermione glanced down at her mug then, trying not to become distracted. Her tea could keep her attention for now. Hermione swirled the liquid around, hoping to become entranced. Why on earth did she feel so paralysed? This was Harry!

Deep down, she knew her curiosity was bubbling, kept at bay only by the utter fatigue she felt. And self-preservation. Hermione knew Harry had no feelings for her - he had told her as much last night, declaring her 'the best friend anyone could ever ask for'. It was bitter sweet indeed.

Harry inhaled then, poised to speak and Hermione looked up. He appeared downcast, almost winded, "I - I didn't think of it as a silly kiss, Hermione."

His eyes were on his mug, too, then, probably praying to it for the same reasons Hermione was. What a great pair of Gryffindors they were.

Hermione's breathing was uneven now, and she couldn't help the audible gulp that she thought may have echoed through the room, "What - what do you mean?"

She could not let herself believe this, Hermione wouldn't let herself hope for the fantasy she had been harbouring for months now. Harry never looked at her in that way; she saw how he watched her, it wasn't like the other girls he dated. Hermione knew he didn't fancy her. She was the best friend.

Hermione was the best friend, she repeated in her head.

"Come on, Hermione, you know how rubbish I am at this stuff," He rubbed the back of his neck, and she noticed that there was a red tinge creeping up it, "I hate this. Let's be normal, let's hug it out and forget about it."

Hermione agreed immediately, "Yes, let's definitely move on from this. It was a one-time fluke, we both had a great night."

"It was a great night, wasn't it?" He replied brightly, his grin large now.

"Absolutely, I've never seen two people so well-matched. I love Jessica, she's the perfect balance to Ron," Hermione could hardly believe she once thought herself to be a good match with Ron. Younger, foolish days.

"You're not going to speak up at the wedding now?"

Hermione groaned; she half regretted showing Ron and Harry so many muggle movies, "You know they won't say 'speak now or forever hold your peace', right?"

"They might, if Ron requested it."

She stared at him, trying to work out if he was being serious, "You're - you're joking right?"

He let out a bark of laughter, "Of course, Hermione. I think Jess would kill him."

"George seemed pretty cosy with the barmaid last night, think that'll last?"

Harry shrugged, "Doubt it, you know what he's like these days."

That tension fell upon them again - maybe things felt too unresolved, too unspoken. Hermione glanced up again and her eyebrows jumped up in fright when she realised Harry was watching her intently. When she caught him, his face reddened and he averted his eyes quickly, "So, er, we're good.."

Hermione cleared her throat, willing the rapid beating of her heart to slow, "Quite.. Quite." She paused, trying to convince herself to change the subject. Hermione knew when to leave well alone and she liked to think over the years, she had honed her ability to curb her curiosity. This was one of those times when that skill needed to be employed. Hermione resolved this internally and then blurted out, "If it wasn't a silly kiss, what was it?"

Seeing his horrified expression, Hermione hurried on, earnest to pull her words back into her mouth, "Oh, I'm sorry, I'm making things more awkward - god, this is awful. Maybe we need a few days to let us forget it and be normal again?"

He licked his lips, "What if - what if we don't 'be normal' again?"

Softening, Hermione covered his hand with hers. Her heart ached when he was vulnerable, worried of being abandoned, "Oh, Harry, of course we will. You're too important to me."

He studied their hands, "No, you don't get me… what if - what if we purposely weren't normal?" Harry turned their hands over, intertwining their hands and Hermione cursed the fact that hers were sweaty with anticipation and nerves, "What if we tried something else?"

If she thought her mouth was dry this morning, it was nothing compared to now. She stumbled a couple of times before settling on, "You're going to have to be more specific, Harry, before I respond."

Harry's grasp on her hand was tighter now, more urgent, and her eyes fell on it only for a moment as his other hand under her chin brought their gazes together. The honest and impassioned look in his eyes stunned her. "If Harry and Hermione being best friends, talking about safe things, seeing each other with friends is normal.. Then.. then why don't we try going out more, at night, with just us? Why don't we try kissing again maybe and - and maybe more - I don't know, I -" Harry stuttered, his face beet red at this point, but his genuinity shining through.

"Harry, are you asking me on a date?" Hermione responded calmly, her tone impossibly still despite the erratic, maddening thumping of her heart.

His grip slacked, "I - I guess I am."

Hermione's heart soared, and she smiled widely in response, scarcely able to believe what he was saying, "Harry, I would love to."

They stayed like that for a moment, beaming at each other in the solace of their silence. Adorable idiots, Hermione thought fondly. Her grin turned bolder, and she asked him, "Would it be … abnormal… to suggest we have another one of those silly kisses?"

Harry laughed and pulled her to her feet, circling his arms around her, "It would be absolutely batty, Hermione."

They were never quite normal again after that afternoon.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for reading. If you feel up to it, please let me know what you thought.

This was spurred on by me thinking that Harry and Hermione were good at reading each other, knew each other very well, and I wanted to defy the trope where they kiss and avoid each other for days and talk a lot of 'ruining friendships' etc.

If you enjoyed this, I currently have a mystery whodunnit type fic with side HHr ongoing too.

Thanks again! Hope you enjoyed,

CR.


End file.
